i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
i think my cat just said my name.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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