after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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