The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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