for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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