i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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