Pappa wants mamma naked
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
