I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
