I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
