she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
