Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
