So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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