susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Randomize
