I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Blood and glitter go together right?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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