Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
