Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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