you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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