Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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