he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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