It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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