Sry I called you an 8
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Your penis caused this!
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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