clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
