dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
