I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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