I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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