Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
