Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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