Its about making memories worth repressing
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
