im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
