Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
