The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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