i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
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