its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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