it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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