I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
