I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
