I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
