I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
