Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
