this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
