Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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