Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
