Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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