nut hugger
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
