He is such a slut. More and more my type.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
