Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
