the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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