By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
