Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
