Dual....:-)
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
