You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
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