Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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