from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize